Having Babies

When my oldest son was born, we knew there might be a "problem" (details skipped for brevity), and the NICU hands were setting up in the room as the OBGYN was getting ready to deliver him. When the OBGYN broke her water, the water flowed out a pukish-green. So anyway, I got behind her, and held her up as they "pushed" my son out. My son's head came out, and then my wife had a contraction that sucked him back in. The OBGYN "dove" in there after him, and grabbed his arm, and yanked him free. Then the NICU hands took over.

I sat back down in a chair, and waited for what seemed like an eternity as about five of them worked on my son in a corner of the room, and I watched that OBGYN as he was sewing my wife back up...he was white as a ghost, and could barely work the needle he was shaking so badly. Finally, after what were the most eternally-lasting five minutes of my life, I heard my son cry.

My son wound up with a broken clavicle from the violent way he had been yanked from the birth canal, and he spent a week in NICU because he had almost drowned in his own poop.