home today with a sick kid

All my good stuff is at home...this will have to do...

LITTLE JOHNNY STRIKES AGAIN The teacher asked the class to
use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, 'My
family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.'

The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use
the word fascinate, not fascinating. Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My
family went to see RockCity and I was 'fascinated.'

The teacher said, 'Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.' Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.

She finally decided there was no way he could damage the
word fascinate', so she called on him. Johnny said, 'My aunt Gina has a
sweater with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten
eight.'

The teacher sat down and cried.