Im 35 years old and live with my 81 year old grandmother

There are a lot of hard working people in the same situation. I think it’s becoming even more common with super inflated home values and rents.

IMO, you might feel this way because you’re not thinking of your situation as part of your plan. You’re saving for the chance to buy a home. Build on that. Set all of your financial and life goals and then build as detailed a plan as you can. If you’re leveraging your living situation towards those goals, then you may not feel as much like a loser.

IMO, from a girlfriend perspective, you look better in your current situation as long as you have a good plan to move your life forward. My wife told me that one of the big reasons she wanted a relationship with me was because I had a plan for my life. She has been justly rewarded for that. 😉