We need a Nose Tackle

Why can't we include coaching staff every year? Not a draft, but like a tournament. All 32 teams throw their staff into the arena and they have to compete in various games or skills like darts, sports trivia, tug-o-war, chess, with bonus points for creative play design and the ability to not look stupid.
The loser gets to pick first.

Sorry, all I have left is sarcasm.