Things That Make You Feel Old

Hehe. I'm a sleepy, boring middle aged dad so there's not much to it. But I'll humor you.

Just about every Sunday I go with my family to a busy breakfast place to get a quick bite. They don't have table service. You order your food and then look for a table, which can be a little challenging on a busy morning. Fortunately, this place is pretty quick so by the time you order there's usually someone getting up from a table. As we were placing our order (myself, my 4 and 6 year olds, my 39 week pregnant wife), a table cleared and it looked like as usual we would slide in to the newly open accommodations. But that was not to be. Some clever guy that had just arrived with his party at the back of the line took it upon himself to claim the table and set up shop. This denied my family a place to sit even as we stood there with hot coffee in hand, super pregnant wife, and bouncing kids.

I normally wouldn't say anything but I'm sort of living on the edge these last few weeks. Personal and professional life has been great but very stressful. Anyway, this grown man with his grown adult friends thought it reasonable to hawk a table ahead of a family with a very pregnant mom and small children and it just sort of put me in a place I don't often go, which is one of confrontation over an unjust yet trivial matter. So I said my brief piece about it and the gentleman took offense and suggested that I was being disrespectful for mentioning his behavior. This lead to a short argumentative exchange. He happened to mention his own children (not present) after which I expressed my hope that he taught them better manners than he had exhibited in that moment. /endscene

Unfortunately I let it get the better of my mood for the next bit of time. I probably should not have confronted the guy in such an obvious way.
People are just raised with a different set of values unfortunately. It can go against everything that we were taught growing up. I had an example of this recently. I was exiting the local coffee shop that I frequent. As I am exiting I see a lady walking towards me and the door is pretty heavy so I hold the door open for her. By normal standards and judging a book by it's cover I could see that this lady approximately 10 years my senior with short hair in a mullet cut with blue jeans, t-shirt and skin with the texture of saddle-leather was probably on the team that enjoyed the company of other ladies. As she walked by she acknowledged me and said "Thanks" and I out of instinct said "Yes ma'am". She quickly turned around and let me know right then and there that I had not business calling her "ma'am". I was taken back and it really caught me off-guard. I automatically responded with "I am sorry, forgive me" thinking that would de-escalate the situation, she then hit me with "You should respect who I am" and that is when I snapped and lost it. I responded with a "No ma'am, I respect my Mother a hell of lot more than I respect you and she is the one that taught me to always be a gentleman". I turned around and immediately went to my vehicle. I heard some choices words from her and I did not acknowledge them.

I was in the wrong on this but I still don't feel an ounce of remorse, not out of hatred or bigotry but because I responded with how I was raised and how I have raised my children. If a set of morals based on politeness to strangers is considered wrong today then I will continue to remain in the wrong.