Things That Make You Feel Old

People are just raised with a different set of values unfortunately. It can go against everything that we were taught growing up. I had an example of this recently. I was exiting the local coffee shop that I frequent. As I am exiting I see a lady walking towards me and the door is pretty heavy so I hold the door open for her. By normal standards and judging a book by it's cover I could see that this lady approximately 10 years my senior with short hair in a mullet cut with blue jeans, t-shirt and skin with the texture of saddle-leather was probably on the team that enjoyed the company of other ladies. As she walked by she acknowledged me and said "Thanks" and I out of instinct said "Yes ma'am". She quickly turned around and let me know right then and there that I had not business calling her "ma'am". I was taken back and it really caught me off-guard. I automatically responded with "I am sorry, forgive me" thinking that would de-escalate the situation, she then hit me with "You should respect who I am" and that is when I snapped and lost it. I responded with a "No ma'am, I respect my Mother a hell of lot more than I respect you and she is the one that taught me to always be a gentleman". I turned around and immediately went to my vehicle. I heard some choices words from her and I did not acknowledge them.

I was in the wrong on this but I still don't feel an ounce of remorse, not out of hatred or bigotry but because I responded with how I was raised and how I have raised my children. If a set of morals based on politeness to strangers is considered wrong today then I will continue to remain in the wrong.
Well I’m pretty sure that you were dealing with an ***hole who also happened to be a lesbian

But it’s also worth noting (I think) that your take away is that morals/politeness is treating everyone the same but is also moral to appreciate everyone’s differences
Those are both right and are also contradictory- which is why a one size fits all approach isn’t infallible