Job Satisfaction

Oh man this thread is so appropriate for me right now.

At age 35 I was pretty much burned out from 10 years as a 911 dispatcher. So my wife and I downsized our house so I could quit work and go back to school to finish my bachelor's degree in Engineering. I was a nerdy smart math kid in high school, but super lazy and undisciplined, so I flunked out of college the first go round.

At age 40 I graduated with my degree. I felt like I could take on the world and do/learn anything.

I was job hunting during the height of COVID. I was lucky to get any job at all, but I got a job at a small engineering firm making GPS satellite receivers. Interesting stuff. I had to take a REALLY low salary
Less than I made at 911. Everyone had a hiring freeze...it was this or nothing.

Except this company was running some kind of ponzi scheme. I was the only engineer on staff and they never gave me any work. I just sat there doing nothing. So I also learned nothing, and actively started to lose skills because I wasn't using them. Finally, after 6 or 7 months paychecks stopped coming and they revealed to us the company was bankrupt, but not closing. I started job hunting immediately. It took 5 months to find something else.

The 2nd job I got is where I still work. The salary is still really low....about the same as I made at 911.

I asked for more money last year...they said no. Actually, I asked for a performance review. All positive...all good we are glad to have you....etc. so THEN I asked for more money. Suddenly, they say I make tons of mistakes and cost the company a lot of extra money to fix my mistakes...etc. funny, no one ever mentioned a specific mistake to me and still hasn't. No raise given. So I still make a COVID salary years after COVID. They made me feel incredibly small and dumb...now I question my abilities and have lost all confidence. I have so stagnated here....i am not learning anything because I perform the same basic level tasks over and over for years now. Unfortunately I am too old to pivot again to another career. I have to make this work...we put all our eggs in this basket.

So, now I am job searching again, looking for a better work environment where I can learn a proper engineering skillset. I have a degree and 4 years experience and can't even get any interviews after over 40 job applications. Yet everyone is supposedly hiring and there is a shortage of engineers. Someone somewhere is lying.

Also, I hate engineering as much as I did 911. It's just the workplace....it's miserable. We aren't meant to sit at a desk for 8 hours and stare at a computer screen. I would rather do anything else, really.

At this point I am totally disillusioned with professional life. It feels like there is no path forward and each time I make more money, everything on the planet increases in price so I don't actually get anywhere. I feel like I made a huge mistake and should have stuck it out at 911. I could have retired in another 10 years with full benefits.


Honestly my favorite job ever was as a dog poop scooper. You get to be outside....and most of the dogs are out and you get to pet them, play with them, give treatos during your work. Unfortunately the salary smells as bad as the sheet.