I could literally feel the discouragement in your post as i read it.. that sucks.. the one thing id say is dont beat yourself up to much for leaving your 911 job; you said you were burnt out, and you made the best decision you knew at the time with the information you had…. That’s all any of us can do.. i think your situation and disillusionment says more about the system that is set up than it does about you … i think we all struggle to find meaning and purpose at one time or another.. when i first began my most recent journey a few years ago, during Covid, it all began with a simple thought that i have since repeated to myself a thousand times : “There has GOT to be a better way… There just has to .”