Feds grant $384,949 to study 'Plasticity in Duck Penis Length' (1 Viewer)

Denzien

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The National Science Foundation (NSF) has awarded a $384,949 grant to Yale University for a study on “Sexual Conflict, Social Behavior and the Evolution of Waterfowl Genitalia” [...] The grant description says,“The project examines how reproductive morphology covaries with season, age, and social environment in a diverse sample of duck species that differ in ecology, territoriality and breeding system."

[...]

Many duck penises are cork-screw shaped and some scientists believe this is because of a form of evolution known as "sexual conflict".

NSF spokeswoman Deborah Wing told CNSNews.com the updated title of the study is "Sexual Conflict, Social Behavior and Evolution." Wing says, "The study met the criteria of the NSF panel of scientific peers as part of the grant approval process."

[...]

"The NSF strives to be good stewards of taxpayers dollars," Wing says, "Basic research often is combined with other research efforts and turns into bigger things."

"Government funded grants for research have assisted in creating the barcode and Google," Wing added.

The NSF grant abstract states, “Broader impacts of the research will be international, national, local, and personal."
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BIG E

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I pretty sure there's a link between duck penises and overweight lesbians.
 

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Is it 'Federal Spending'?
The grant was 0.005% of National Science Foundation spending in 2009 (when it was awarded) and produced several publications. For some perspective this is less than half of the cost of one of the Navy's 3,500 Tomahawk cruise missiles or 0.05% of the lifecycle cost of a single F-22.
 

billinms

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The grant was 0.005% of National Science Foundation spending in 2009 (when it was awarded) and produced several publications. For some perspective this is less than half of the cost of one of the Navy's 3,500 Tomahawk cruise missiles or 0.05% of the lifecycle cost of a single F-22.
But we can't blow anybody up with duck penises.
 

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But we can't blow anybody up with duck penises.
Actually the researcher who received this grant had already investigated explosive duck penises:

Back in 2007, Brennan's team described the strange morphology of this duck's sexual organs. Most male birds don't sport phalluses, and instead have sex by bringing together their so-called cloaca (opening to such regions as the reproductive tract) in order for the male to transfer sperm to the female. Not only does C. moschata have a penis, but it's a relatively large, flexible penis (even when erect) extending up to nearly 8 inches (20 cm) inverted inside the body.

When mating, the male everts its penis to extend the length of the female's vagina.

Being so well-endowed is supposed to give the male a reproductive advantage in forced mating when a male essentially jumps the female with no consent. But Brennan hypothesized that females, with their complex genitalia, could turn the tables and make copulation difficult for such macho males.

First the team used high-speed video to see how the odd organs get the job done, finding the eversion process was explosive — taking about a half-second. The results came from ducks at a commercial duck farm in which the animals were trained to provide semen for artificial insemination.
If the DoD hasn't already weaponized them then it's probably on the to-do list. The lifecycle cost of non-weaponized ducks is under $100 so even with a tenfold cost increase we should be able to replace one F-22 with a million weaponized ducks. Millions of well-endowed explosive corkscrew penised unmanned combat Anitidae (WEECPUCAs) are sure to strike fear, or at least feelings of inadequacy, into the hearts of our enemies.
 

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