I went to Tijuana a couple weeks ago to do 5-MeO-DMT (1 Viewer)

[guidomerkinsrules]

I had another "fixed" edit for this one but since I have no dog in the fight and really have zero problems with men dancing ballet I decided to leave it alone. I've always thought those ballet dudes probably get some extremely hot ballet chicks.....with destroyed feet which would be a deal breaker for me.

You’re describing my ex Japanese gf
From the ankles up, one of the most beautiful women- but her feet were BUSTED
Which was… not … a deal breaker for me

 

[0rion]

You’re describing my ex Japanese gf
From the ankles up, one of the most beautiful women- but her feet were BUSTED
Which was… not … a deal breaker for me

I just can't snuggle up next to someone that has some toes hunting and others fishing.

 

[guidomerkinsrules]

Just happen to be watching the ‘fantastic fungi’ doc on Netflix
One of its contentions is that magic mushrooms might explain our evolutionary cognitive leap

More specifically that mushrooms enhance/foster synesthesia and that abstract language as we use it is really a form of synesthesia

 

[mjcouvi]

@mjcouvi Thoughts?

The Church of Psilomethoxin Uses Psychedelics to Worship

The army vets behind the Church of Psilomethoxin have a unique sacrament – one that involves a drug derived from shrooms and a poisonous amphibian.

www.vice.com

I think that's great. I think it's the future of mental health. Not this specific church per se, and I didn't read the whole article to know the details, but the idea that we are meant to explore our own minds through these substances is rooted in a human history that predates any religious faith doctrine, predates language, as far as I know. I'm relatively convinced that entheogens (like psilocybin and DMT) are likely at the root of nearly every religion and I'm far from alone in that growing belief.

Let me set a scene for you -- I'm in my little high rise studio in Bangkok. I just went through a blur of a bender, one in a long line of benders -- glorious, tragic, life-affirming, life-wasting, love-making, devastating -- and I am rendered nearly useless in bed, hallucinating, every second experiencing unimaginable mental agony. Sleep is impossible. I struggle to make it 20 feet to the sink just to get water, water I shouldn't even be drinking, because it's Bangkok. But I have to drink water and I have nothing else.

My hands don't even work to use my phone I'm shaking so bad. I crawl to the sink to pull myself up, manage barely to fill up a bottle and fall back to the ground, nearly yanking the thinly made fixture out of its plumbing in the process. I'm out of food but know I need some sort of calories and minerals, so I manage to grab boxes of salt and sugar with me to bring to bed and I force myself to ingest some of it because I'm dehydrated and malnourished.

I pee in a bowl next to me as I lay there, and not very well. When I have to get up to sheet I fall every time and have to crawl the rest of the way. I can't even wipe my arse. The chances of me dying there were probably fairly high. I don't know how long the worst it lasted during this particular withdrawal, maybe two days.

That was hardly the most awful circumstance I put myself in. It's perhaps a less than 1% sample size of my painful experiences, but it has sat with me as perhaps sadder than any other because I was truly alone and exceptionally terrified.

I got back to renewing the cycle, over and over, feeding my addiction, as soon as I could, after I put in the work of a few weeks of healing. Most often I'd end up in one of the lovely Bangkok hospitals -- and I say this seriously, I would rather go to a hospital in Bangkok than in the US. I will forever be grateful to the incredible Thai people and hope to revisit them in the future, perhaps live out my life there if I go that way.

I can't talk about any of this without entheogens, meditation, breathwork. Just blocking it out, I've tried, doesn't work, always comes back to torture my mind. I have to explore it and reframe it.

I have suffered. I can now frame that suffering positively. I can honestly say, in this moment that I'm writing this, I would not trade my life for any other. I would not trade the memory of my suffering for any amount of power or money. It is beautiful to me. If I die today I can say that I got to explore some of the greatest contrasts in human existence that have been available to me, the highest highs, the lowest lows. I've realized that in many ways I sought my suffering, brought it upon myself, and that's ok, I think I needed it, even deserved it, as I can frame it as a gift to my life. I'm not finished.

The DMT was just an introduction to the possibilities -- it provided a realization that it is possible to look in the mirror and have deep unconditional love for one's self, that it's possible for the mind to find complete and all-encompassing peace. I've put a lot of work in since, and the work is continuous. I don't feel so positive about everything all the time.

My addiction will always be with me in some way of course. I've been opened to the idea I was born with it through genetic inheritance, that's a distinct possibility for me given my family history. I'm definitely not always in such a perfect state of mind about my past. It'll still come up and haunt me sometimes, but I know I can always get back to the right place with the help of entheogens, meditation, breathwork, and I can do it safely as part of a healthy lifestyle, without resorting to the poison that is alcohol.

The meditation and breathwork, and really the two are one in the same for me, is no small matter and it's something I've only recently approached mastering. I can reach transitive states of consciousness now through that alone. It's not magic or a mental trick, it's science, physiology, neurology, effort, practice, overcoming fear, and for me that provides a connection to a spiritual feeling. Wim Hof was a big help here -- he provided a revolution in my thinking about what the human body is capable of, from a scientific/biologic perspective, and I like to push it. I took myself into that state, with meditation/breathwork just before I wrote this so I could reply with ease, because talking about my darkness isn't easy, and I take this too seriously to not give a mindful response.

I enjoy writing about this but haven't much, as I have to do it with consideration, deliberation, preparation. I even know that part of me will actually regret sharing so much with strangers, opening up, but that's something I need to work to get over. I want more minds to open and I don't think I can be a part of helping that along if I don't get personal.

I still feel very much at the beginning stages of discovery about myself and this world we share, and I am very fortunate to be in a position to wholly pursue what's right for me. I'll try to share more as I'm compelled.

Thanks y'all for a friendly place to share.

 

[Dago]

I've become curious about trying this. My anxiety has become out of control and I've heard people say it did wonders for them on that front. There's also actual research pointing in that direction.

And maybe I'll get to see those mechanical elves.

My senior year of high school, a group of us were on acid at Disney World. The It's A Small World ride was terrifying....I had to put a friend in a head lock to keep them from jumping out the boat

 

[guidomerkinsrules]

My senior year of high school, a group of us were on acid at Disney World. The It's A Small World ride was terrifying....I had to put a friend in a head lock to keep them from jumping out the boat

Acid and shrooms can be WAY different trips
I wouldn’t do acid if I had anxiety
Probably would do shrooms

 

[Scorpius the Allfather]

Acid and shrooms can be WAY different trips
I wouldn’t do acid if I had anxiety
Probably would do shrooms

I had some golden teachers that gave me bad anxiety but only when I did them by myself. It was weird. I also felt like I had to make myself breathe, like it was no longer involuntary. Other than that, it was fun. I watched an episode of Farscape where Scorpius makes someone bite the tip of their finger off. I knew it was going to happen, but it was still shocking.

 

[Tapxe]

Coming soon to the US?

FDA creates path for psychedelic drug trials

Federal guidance for psychedelic drug trials could encourage the mainstreaming of substances like magic mushrooms and LSD as behavioral health treatments.

www.axios.com