Kill It With Fire (official thread devoted to spiders, snakes, etc.) (1 Viewer)

I was in a parking garage elevator with a giant spider looking down at me from his perch on the ceiling. Luckily for the GoPark, he didn't drop down on me and I didn't have a blow torch on me. Because if he had made a move on me, that would have been my go to defense. It was the most terrifying 3-floor elevator ride of my life. I may have nightmares all week.
hahaha

i hate insects. i just tolerate a few more than others. if the spider is already in a web, i ignore it.

bees are harmless, usually.
.
wasps are absolute forking butt crevasses and i swell where bitten, and my throat starts to swell. not fun. I'm alergic to needles and having a eoitomepen or whatever stabbed into you is enough to avoid them.

i just don't fork with any spiders unless i have a lighter and aersol.

snakes, rats, mice, and whatever, i am not ashamed that i will cry and hide like a little birch.
 
I was going to ask if y'all grew up on the same street... is he magpie dangerous?


well, technically i dated his cousin on the same street, before they moved a few blocks over.

fork magpies. if those butt crevasses have a nest nearby, they will swoop you if come within 20 feet or so. forkers hurt when they peck you. alternative is where a mask or something scary on your head to try and prevent.
 
Once when I was dictating a note from home during my residency while sitting on the couch, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye above me that was moving downward. A large spider was descending from my ceiling and landed on my leg. I immediately began yelling f-bombs and knocked it off my leg. I then realized that I had basically cursed for about 30 seconds into the recording of my dictation. I then had to make an addendum to said dictation explaining the situation along with a profuse apology. Luckily, I never heard anything back about it lol...
 
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Why is it that none of the Australians I have met have been right? What is happening down there under.

They're all descendants of criminals and live in a giant desert full of weird animals and their Burger King is called Hungry Jack's and their most successful exports are Yahoo Serious and Paul Hogan. It's just a losing proposition all the way around.
 
Snakes no problem, lizards? I will burn my house down. Someone hung a lizard on my ear at the age of 5 and they are now my kryptonite!
you and my mom would get along great. take that however you interpret :)

(seriously though, she is scared to death of lizards)
 
They're all descendants of criminals and live in a giant desert full of weird animals and their Burger King is called Hungry Jack's and their most successful exports are Yahoo Serious and Paul Hogan. It's just a losing proposition all the way around.
@Madmarsha

he is absolutely correct. 100%.
 
Can I had centipedes to this bonfire. Living in New Mexico, we encountered bats, wolves, giant car damaging tumbleweeds (not kidding), and lots of spiders and other crawling things but centipedes/millipedes were the freaking worst to find. Makes my skin crawl thinking about it.

The good news: everyone owned a flamed thrower. We had a flame thrower. Quite useful in the desert.

The bad news: flame throwers don't work well in doors.
 
Snakes and spiders are OK, but mosquitoes, flies, ticks and fleas get this
121245
 
I agree but how am I to differentiate said honey bees from regular bee?
Honey bees are usually on a flower of some kind. Wasps and yellow jackets especially just chase you for the freakin fun of it. beaches.
So in short, practice and a lot of running.
 
Speaking of the aforementioned bat, fun story.

It's about 5:30 am. The wife gets up for work and does the usual routine. We have a step down area in the bed room with a fireplace where she gets ready. So it's still dark and she just turns on the closet light because I get up a little bit later.

Well she looks down and is wondering why her black hair tie is on the floor. So she gets to thinking and using good judgement, instead of just picking it up, she takes her foot and touches the hair tie.

Well again, that particular hair tie decided to come unglued, P'Oed off, wings come out, teeth come out and the noise this thing made would make your hair stand up.
Apparently that hair tie came through the fireplace.

The screaming that ensued after that was hysterically horrible. Needless to say I got up early that morning. Good times.
 
Speaking of the aforementioned bat, fun story.

It's about 5:30 am. The wife gets up for work and does the usual routine. We have a step down area in the bed room with a fireplace where she gets ready. So it's still dark and she just turns on the closet light because I get up a little bit later.

Well she looks down and is wondering why her black hair tie is on the floor. So she gets to thinking and using good judgement, instead of just picking it up, she takes her foot and touches the hair tie.

Well again, that particular hair tie decided to come unglued, P'Oed off, wings come out, teeth come out and the noise this thing made would make your hair stand up.
Apparently that hair tie came through the fireplace.

The screaming that ensued after that was hysterically horrible. Needless to say I got up early that morning. Good times.
:smilielol: You got me tearing up over here!
Now THAT is an anxiety that's going to linger for a while.
 




tenor.gif
 
you do know that half of my life growing up was in rural victoria, australia? yep, dual citizenship beotches.

somehow it never bothered me and we had the two of the deadliest snakes in around us.

i've killed a few 'brown' snakes, multiple redback spiders, and several poisonous centipedes, or maybe millipedes, whatever. those forkers are aggressive, as are kangaroos, wallabies, and especially the butt crevasse koalas.

it almost wasn't a consideration of what to find most of the time. you just had to be alert walking places.

Christ Zeetes you've got more layers than a bloomin onion
 

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