Post Your Puns (1 Viewer)

[Kicks]

Post punny stuff here....

 

[gavinj]

 

[Devildog]

 

[DadsDream]

Question: What is the difference between Paul Bunyan and Wolverine?
Answer (read aloud) : Paul Bunyan is a HUGE AXE MAN and Wolverine is HUGH JACKMAN

 

[Beast]

I was going to make a joke about sodium, but Na

 

[purvis_guy]

Since I quit soccer, I've lost my goal in life.

 

[soupcan dan]

i gotta go to work this morning---i'm the key man.

 

[Kicks]

That is UDDERLY hilarious.

 

[Grumpy Old Manatee]

Some of these are so bad, they just qualify as 2/3 of a pun: P-U

 

[zeetes]

 

[brandon8283]

That is UTTERLY hilarious.

I assume you meant "udderly".

 

[Bill]

A man who worked in an office high up in the One Shell Square building began to feel the stress of being over-worked and was constantly behind on his job. He began to wish he could find another hard worker who could carry some of the workload.

One day he read of a scientific breakthrough in the field of cloning and decided to see what could be done. The researches admitted to him that it was still experimental, but that they felt certain they could make a cloned copy of that desperate man.

Sure enough they were successful and the man brought his 'copy' up to his office. Things worked out very well for a few days, but soon something went wrong. This clone became very vulgar... cursing and swearing all the time. He was rude & crude to all the secretaries in the office... even flashing himself and propositioning these poor women.

Despite his attempts to correct his clone, he could not stop the horrible behavior. One day in his desperation the man decided to push his clone through the glass of the building, and he fell to the sidewalk below, killing him instantly!

Within minutes the police came up to the man's office slapping the handcuffs on him and they began to read him his rights. "I did nothing wrong!" shouted the man. "That guy was just a copy of me... he didn't even really exist! On what charges could you possibly be arresting me?!?!?"

"That's easy" said the cop...








"You're being arrested for an obscene clone fall."

 

[purvis_guy]

William Tell and his family were excellent league bowlers. Unfortunately since it was so long ago, no records exist of this. So there is no way to say for whom the Tells bowled.

 

[Kicks]

Abbot John settled in a small village called Tridville, a community of dwarfs. Every morning they would line up and bend over. A troll then came from the forest and kicked each one in the butt. Abbot John thought this odd, but maybe it was some sort of ritual, a penance. So one day he joined the Trids and stood at the end of the line and bent over when the troll appeared. Each Trid got kicked, but he skipped the Abbot. Next day the abbot placed himself in the middle of the line, but still was skipped. On the third day he placed himself first in line, but was still not kicked by the troll. Confused, he asked the Trids why wasn't he kicked. They replied "Silly abbot, kicks are for Trids".

 

[Bill]

Kicks... this thread is making guys like us sink back into grammar school mentality.