sad but true. (1 Viewer)

Det. Brees

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You know you work in Law Enforcement when...


1) You have the bladder capacity of five people.

2) You have ever restrained someone and it was not a sexual experience.

3) You believe that 50 % of people are a waste of good air.

4) Your idea of a good time is a shooting or a car crash (Rollover).

5) You put your finger on the emergency button on your radio when anyone seems friendly towards you.

6) You believe in the aerial spraying of Prozac and birth control pills.

8) You have your weekends off planned for a year.

9) You believe the government should require a permit to reproduce.

10) You refer to your favorite restaurant by the intersection at which it's located.

11) You have ever wanted to hold a seminar entitled: "Suicide...getting it right the first time."

12) You ever had to put the phone on hold before you begin laughing uncontrollably.

13) You think caffeine should be available in IV form.

14) You believe anyone who says, "I only had two beers" is going to blow more than a .15.

15) You find out a lot about paranoia just by following people around while driving.

16) If anyone has ever said to you, "There are people dying out there and you are here eating lunch."

17) People flag you down on the street and ask you directions to strange places...and you know where they're located.

18) You can discuss where you are going to eat with your partner while standing over a dead body.

19) You are the only person introduced at social gatherings by profession.

20) You walk into places and people think its high comedy to seize their buddy and shout, "They've come to get you, Bill."

21) You do not see daylight from November until May.

22) People shout, "I aint sick!" when you walk into a room and think they're being hugely funny and original.

23) A week's worth of laundry consists of 5 t-shirts, 5 pair s of socks, and 5 pairs of underwear.

24) You've ever referred to Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday as "my weekend", or "this is my Friday".

25) You've ever written off cell phone bills and sun glasses as a business deduction.

26) You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, it sure is quiet tonight."

27) Discussing dismemberment over a meal seems perfectly normal to you.

28) You find humor in other people's stupidity.

29) You have left more meals on the restaurant table than you've eaten.
 

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