Someone Please Decipher This Email I received (1 Viewer)

insidejob

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I've now gotten it twice. It goes to my junk mail which I check a couple times a day at work just so nothing slips through the cracks. I thought I'd posted about it the first time, but apparently was too tired since I came across it on the weekend late at night while cleaning out my inbox on my laptop at home. Here is the content of the message (I'll try to fix the formatting as quickly as possible, just know it came to me in one mega-paragraph with little to no spacing between sentences):

Two seats were vacant. They improved dramatically once the lead singer left. The truth is that you pay for your lifestyle in hours. Today I dressed my unicorn in preparation for the race. The tart lemonade quenched her thirst, but not her longing. I liked their first two albums but changed my mind after that charity gig. She traveled because it cost the same as therapy and was a lot more enjoyable. She always speaks to him in a loud voice. He ran out of money, so he had to stop playing poker. Plans for this weekend include turning wine into water. I liked their first two albums but changed my mind after that charity gig. I am counting my calories, yet I really want dessert. He had a wall full of masks so she could wear a different face every day. Nothing is as cautiously cuddly as a pet porcupine. There was coal in his stocking and he was thrilled. The hand sanitizer was actually clear glue. I currently have 4 windows open up… and I don’t know why. I am my aunt's sister's daughter. The complicated school homework left the parents trying to help their kids quite confused. The paintbrush was angry at the color the artist chose to use. He was surprised that his immense laziness was inspirational to others. He created a pig burger out of beef. His thought process was on so many levels that he gave himself a phobia of heights. He found the chocolate covered roaches quite tasty. He had decided to accept his fate of accepting his fate. The tortoise jumped into the lake with dreams of becoming a sea turtle. They did nothing as the raccoon attacked the lady’s bag of food. You've been eyeing me all day and waiting for your move like a lion stalking a gazelle in a savannah. People generally approve of dogs eating cat food but not cats eating dog food. The three-year-old girl ran down the beach as the kite flew behind her. The murder hornet was disappointed by the preconceived ideas people had of him. She saw the brake lights, but not in time. Shakespeare was a famous 17th-century diesel mechanic. Although it wasn't a pot of gold, Nancy was still enthralled at what she found at the end of the rainbow. It was obvious she was hot, sweaty, and tired. They wandered into a strange Tiki bar on the edge of the small beach town. He realized there had been several deaths on this road, but his concern rose when he saw the exact number. He found his art never progressed when he literally used his sweat and tears. Martha came to the conclusion that shake weights are a great gift for any occasion. She borrowed the book from him many years ago and hasn't yet returned it. The murder hornet was disappointed by the preconceived ideas people had of him. He learned the important lesson that a picnic at the beach on a windy day is a bad idea. She finally understood that grief was her love with no place for it to go.
I don't know if this is the insane ramblings of someone who should be medicated or some really, really far out artistic work. They weren't selling me anything, no links to click, no "donate here" buttons....nothing. Except for this message.

I'm interested in knowing if anyone besides me has received this email. Maybe it's something that's been going around for a while and just got to me. I really do not know what to think about this.

How about you?

(I couldn't help myself and added two periods to the end of sentences they'd left them out of. I hate bad grammar.)
 

livefromDC

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Anyone who read that in its entirety has been brainwashed just like Bucky was in Avengers: Civil War. You don't know it yet, but when it comes time to root for the good guys, you'll be chanting "rise up", like the manchurian candidates you now are. And let's not even talk about voting... God help us. We need a mod to shut this thread down immediately.
 

WhoDatPhan78

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I think the Qanon guys could tell you what it means, but you wouldn’t want to hear it.
 
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insidejob

insidejob

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Let's talk about how often you're checking your junk mail folder. I think a couple times a day is way too frequent.
Dude, I never had to check it t once but I had to have my hard drive replaced, I've been missing important business emails that never went anywhere but my inbox in the past. I'm using a licensed copy of Outlook. I've never had this problem until the hard drive had to be swapped out. I'm even getting messages sent to my junk mail that I've sent and received multiple messages to/from since the switch. IDK what's going on but I'd rather check my junk mail a few times a day to not lose money than to just pretend like this isn't happening.
 
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insidejob

insidejob

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I think the Qanon guys could tell you what it means, but you wouldn’t want to hear it.
Probably. Actually had one of them in our office today (not my client) who refused to wear a mask (disregarding the huge sign on the door saying you need to be wearing one from the second you step out of your vehicle until you get back in) and his agent had to take him down the street to Puccinos to show him the proposal because he was creating such a scene that it was getting close to having to call security on this moron. Why can't people just at least pretend to care?
 

Charlie Brizzown

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Dude, I never had to check it t once but I had to have my hard drive replaced, I've been missing important business emails that never went anywhere but my inbox in the past. I'm using a licensed copy of Outlook. I've never had this problem until the hard drive had to be swapped out. I'm even getting messages sent to my junk mail that I've sent and received multiple messages to/from since the switch. IDK what's going on but I'd rather check my junk mail a few times a day to not lose money than to just pretend like this isn't happening.
I'll let you slide this time.
 

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