Worst birthday ever! Advice needed! (1 Viewer)

Andrus

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My son-in-law Scott (my daughter-Sheena's spouse) died suddenly in my home tonight, from what the coroner thinks was a massive coronary caused by a blood clot in his neck, but will have to confirm.

I had just gotten back from having a birthday dinner with my wife in Carencro. We stopped at Firehouse Subs and McDonalds and got Sheena and the grandkids some fast food on the way back home.

When we got home, I saw Scott, asked him if he wanted some McDonalds and he said he wasn't hungry. I then saw him walk towards his room. My daughter said that she had gone off to take a bath, and I went to my PC to update the news here.

Not that long thereafter my daughter runs into my office in a panic and says she can't wake Scott up. I ran into his room and began to shake him to try to wake him up, no response. I checked his pulse. No pulse! He was purple and not breathing. I immediately began CPR and Sheena called 911. We (my son Andre, Sheena and I) continued CPR while being coached online by the 911 respondent. The police showed up about 10 minutes later and helped with the CPR, then a few minutes later the EMT's showed up. They worked on Scott for 20 minutes... tried everything, and then called it. Just like that, he was gone.

A little later, Sheena told her daughter Arya of her fathers passing, and I think that I am more devastated by that than anything. Naturally it is extremely hard to see your daughter in so much pain, but young grand children? Devastating!

Scott was 43 years old, a big Saints fan, as you can imagine, and was seemingly in good health. He loved his 2 kids (5 year old daughter and 2.5 year old son, my grandchildren) dearly, and was a very good father to them, as well as he was a spouse to Sheena. .

For that, and many other reasons, I loved Scott, too! But I don't care about me here, I am deeply concerned about my daughter and grand children. Of course Sheena is devastated. Since Sheena is stricken with MS, is physically disabled, and really can't work, It looks like my wife will have to take care of them, which I am more than happy to do, but I am no spring chicken. What happens when we are gone?

My wife and I had moved them all back to our home in Louisiana from Colorado a few months back due to them struggling financially, and they simply couldn't make it up there. It wasn't for the lack of trying. Scott did his best. It just didn't work out. He had no insurance of any sort, and no money. I am just sitting here thinking about how to move forward. The downturn in the Oil business that started in late 2015, in addition to helping to keep Scott and Sheena afloat destroyed my wife and I financially, as we were both out of work for two years ourselves. So I don't know what to do here. The Melancon funeral home people left with his body about an hour ago, and I told them I would call them tomorrow to make the arrangements.

Anyone have any experience with this? Do funeral homes finance funerals?

Sorry, I am simply in shock and not thinking straight. So forgive me if I seem a bit off. There are a 1000 things going on in my mind at the moment. Naturally for something like this, I turn to the community. It seems most of my friends in life are rooted here.

Edit: Updated to add gofundme link

 
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Doug B

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Andrus, so sorry to hear about this. I don't have any words of wisdom beyond what the SR community has already posted. Your family is in our prayers.
 

rsmith2783

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Very sorry to hear about this. Death is never easy, and I couldn't imagine what that day was like. Your family are in my prayers.
 

crosswatt

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I did so because Dan in Lafayette called me and told me in no uncertain terms that he would take care of the upfront costs of the funeral and burial, and he could get his funds back through the gofundme, and if not, no time limits on paying him back... j
That @Dan in Lafayette pretends to be such an unapologetic sourpuss all the time, when really he's just a good and decent and wonderful friend and brother. I owe you a deep, wet kiss right on the lips if ever I meet you this side of heaven, Dan.
 

SaintsFanatic

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I've been on this forum for a while but have never met anyone, much less Andrus. My only interaction with him is 2 weeks ago he offered me his training camp tickets for free, which was awesome.

That, and with how much he does to keep up this site, and he is A OK in my book. I don't have much to give at the moment, but I'd like to throw you some on Paypal(i don't want gofundme taking any fees); so feel free to PM your Paypal address sir.

Also, from reading these posts I've discovered at lot you guys and girls are BADASS! Seriously, some strong people in here. All of your stories are absolutely heartbreaking and I don't know what I would do in your shoes. I'm always cognizant of how fortunate I've been to avoid these types of situations, but at the same time knowing it'll happen one day. I can only hope to be as brave and strong as what you've all showed in this thread. You guys are an inspiration and i'm so glad to be a part of this forum!
 
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Andrus

Andrus

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Andrus so sorry about your loss. I will be in Lafayette tomorrow. Is there a way to bring a contribution by?

Kyle...

We will be having another SR lunch get together in Lafayette soon. We haven't set a date yet, but anyone that wants to join us is welcome. Just send me a message and I'll put you on the contact list for it, or email andrus @saintsreport.com (without the space).
 
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FLYGHT

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May God Bless Yu and your Family In this time of grief. You do so much for everyone else it pains my heart to see you in pain this way. God bless you...You Will survive.
 

Muleskinnerblues

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Andrus please accept our heartfelt condolences for you and your family during this difficult time. May Gods Grace comfort you and your loved ones and please know you all are definitely in our daily prayers.
 

Saints fan in VA

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As an 06 guy, I am glad I found your website, don't post alot. Love you brother, Family is everything. Thank you for your reply. Been thru alot military and life, it's hard. I can't name them all. But my parents it sucks being deployed. I have a friend that is a pastor. RIP
 

Sheena

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I made another post in the gofundme thread, but I do want to say thanks here too. Thanks for your love, thoughts, prayers, generosity, and kind words. They mean everything to me, and he would be so touched by so many people looking out for his family. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
 

msusaintsfan

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Man so sorry to hear this. Prayers for you and the entire family.

Many on here know I lost my wife 4 years ago this past July 28th. Know we are here for you.

The whole funeral thing was a blur as I tried to deal with the loss. It happened so quick. She passed on a Wednesday in Texas and the funeral was on Saturday in NC. So I know what you are going through on that spectrum. We had insurance and it would take awhile to get, but the funeral home worked with me.
 

DaveXA

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Man so sorry to hear this. Prayers for you and the entire family.

Many on here know I lost my wife 4 years ago this past July 28th. Know we are here for you.

The whole funeral thing was a blur as I tried to deal with the loss. It happened so quick. She passed on a Wednesday in Texas and the funeral was on Saturday in NC. So I know what you are going through on that spectrum. We had insurance and it would take awhile to get, but the funeral home worked with me.
I'm curious of the claims process. Did the insurance company send you a check then you pay the funeral home? Or did funeral home just say send us money when you get your insurance check? I've never had to deal with that before, but it might be something we'll face in the not too distant future.
 

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