The problem of White Supremacy - Spinoff from Buffalo Shooting thread

Awful story, it's amazing how many minority children ask for "regular" food or to just buy lunch at school (and ironically decades later the same food they were shunned for at school is now trendy on the authentic cuisine foodie circuit)

and to @First Time Poster point - this is something his own child experienced and the child's white father still needs proof to believe that this happened
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........The original poster (OP) revealed her daughter is 6 and is in second grade, and she was doing remote learning until a few months ago, so she hasn't "physically" been in school for very long.

Her daughter recently told her mother that she didn't want packed lunches anymore and that she wanted to eat what the other kids ate. The Redditor added she had not been wanting to eat her favorite food and was "asking for pizza more."

"I asked her why she didn't [want] to eat her favorite foods anymore, and she told me she wanted to be able to sit with the other students," the woman explained. "I was shocked because I didn't know she wasn't sitting with the other students, and she told me it was because her teacher made her sit in the other room by herself during lunch times because she brought 'smelly foods.'"

The OP revealed that growing up she was also "targeted by teachers" who didn't let her bring shrimp or things with garlic or onion as they "hated the smell." She admitted she tries not to pack her daughter anything that could "cause them to target" her, "like spam, sushi, or egg fried rice."

"I was really upset because she is half Chinese, but she clearly looks Asian, and I felt it was my childhood trauma happening [to] her," the OP said.

The woman called her daughter's homeroom teacher for a meeting, but the teacher said she didn't make her sit in another room to eat. However, the OP's daughter told her to ask her best friend, who "confirmed" the story. Another teacher also admitted she had seen the girl eating "alone."

The homeroom teacher then "switched stories" that the girl had sat alone but it was due to the girl bringing in a persimmon to school, and the teacher said it was "distracting" the other children as they thought she was "eating a tomato, and she didn't want her distracting the other students by having 'foreign' food."

The OP continued: "She refused to believe it was inappropriate and said she didn't see anything wrong with sending her to eat by herself. I had to go to the principal and take my daughter to another homeroom to finish up the school year because that teacher said it only happened once despite my daughter swearing up and down it happened every few days for weeks before she told me."

Her daughter also mentioned a time she brought tomato egg stir fry, and a boy was "bullying" her because "it looked like blood," and their teacher sent her to eat in the other room instead of telling the boy to stop.

The OP's husband doesn't believe his daughter, and he said the teachers would have said something, but the woman doesn't think he "understands because he is white.".............

there's just not enough throat punching inflicted on people who need their throats punched
get that woman out of the ******* classroom
 
"Wait, there's more proof?!" LOL.
I've asked multiple times if there are more than the two videos, both of which I've watched multiple times. Even though more than one person has referred to more evidence and "all the videos," the only response I've gotten is you mocking me. So if there are other videos out there showing Sesame Place parks possibly showing racist behavior, no, I have not seen them.

This is why I said what I said. Good white folks, like yourself, and I mean that genuinely, not sarcastically, are the problem. You know systemic racism exists. But, instead of your default being to believe us, it's always, "eh, I don't see it, I don't experience, I'll need to see more." And, even if you get more, it's "well, I would handle it like this" or "I wouldn't do that."

Until yall become real allies in this fight, the status quo will remain just that.
I appreciate the sentiment and I do appreciate your perspective. The problem I have is that it seems as if you are asking me (society) to make the default to be to believe you (the accuser). So, from my perspective, you are asking me to ignore all of the other situational facts and first assume that, since I know that systemic racism exists and racism is a possibility, it's more than likely the case. That seems less a logical way of looking at things and a more emotional one. That doesn't feel like justice to me, even if it's only in the court of opinion. As we all know, eventually, inevitably, the court of public opinion seeps into the halls of justice. I'm not sure I am capable of putting aside my instincts like that, but that also doesn't mean that I cannot be your ally.

As for "seeing it, experiencing it," yes, I have both seen and experienced first hand, racism and discrimination both perpetuated on others (minorities) and myself (not racial discrimination). I doubt that it's on the same level as everyone else & very definitely not on the level of the general minority population. But I have seen it & I have experienced it and I do know what it looks like. So, if I say that I don't see something that you do, it's not necessarily because I am not capable of seeing it. Also, if I say that I would handle something differently, that's simply human nature. All of us have an idea of how we would handle a situation and typically it's to change the outcome to something that we would consider favorable to us. Different people have different perspectives of what they consider favorable, so obviously the advice may be taken in different ways.

I, mean, that's a bit Mufasa talking to Simba, aloft Pride Rock isn't it? "All you see is yours, except that one spot. Elephant graveyard. You can't go there." You really think Daddy zebra is having the same conversation with Zebra Jr. "If that happened to my child..." That's the whole point! It's not happening to yall/your kids! Of course your assumption is that it isn't purposeful. If it does happen, it probably wasn't. Unfortunately, minority parents don't get to make that assumption. Sooner or later, yall are gonna have to accept our experiences are different. We know when it's benign and when it isn't because it regularly happens to us. WE, one more time, WE know the difference. You gonna believe us or nah?

I'll take "Nah" for $1000 Alex! "It happens to all of us!" "We all go through it!" Like I said, if we all live long enough to see that societal shoe on the other foot, keep that same energy. Remember, we need more proof and if that's provided, we all go through it.
Mufasa on pride rock? I think you have a much higher opinion of my status in society than I do. If you're a zebra, I'm certainly not the king of your domain nor even close to it.

You say you know the difference, but do you really? Certainly when it's blatant, but in every situation do you know the difference? Take for instance this case with this lady and her children, do you know for a certainty that it was more than likely due to racial bias? Do you know anything about the person who perpetuated that racial bias? Is she even white or is she of another race? I assume she wasn't black, but only because the park didn't immediately throw that out there in damage control. Are you so willing to assume that she was racially biased based on what you've seen and the fact that you know that racial biases exist? What if it wasn't racial bias? What if it happened exactly as she said it did? Do you think it's justice for her to have to go through all of this based on the evidence you have? If this thing ends up going to court, which it won't because Sesame Street wouldn't dare risk more bad publicity by taking this lady to court over this, then it's more than likely this young girl's identity will come out. If the situation happened as she said it happened & she really didn't ignore the kids on purpose, do you think that will really matter? Are you prepared for her to be held accountable whether she is truly guilty or not? Because that is what will happen. Her life will be turned upside down over this whether it's deserved or not, if it hasn't already.

Let me ask this: If you are a park manager, what is your solution to this problem? You can give all the sensitivity training you want, but inevitably another minority child will be overlooked and the assumption will immediately be racial bias. Then you're right back where you started, being accused of systemic racial bias within your park. How can you possibly fix that?
 
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there's just not enough throat punching inflicted on people who need their throats punched
get that woman out of the ******* classroom
who I'm sure truly and honestly doesn't know what she did wrong and thinks she's the victim here
 
who I'm sure truly and honestly doesn't know what she did wrong and thinks she's the victim here
I don't know about that. She denied separating her in the first place. That would suggest some level of guilt. Maybe she didn't realize what she was doing initially, which I can't imagine either, but she certainly realized it when the parent addressed it with her.
 
Well since it’s hard to see why it would be in the trans thread, that would leave this one
(Unless you’re one of this bathroom people- which I really don’t think you are)
Or one of the "I don't think story time with a trans" or placing trans women in prisons for women, etc is a good idea.

No, wasn't looking to derail this thread with that discussion. I just noticed that it could apply to either subject.
 
Or one of the "I don't think story time with a trans" or placing trans women in prisons for women, etc is a good idea.

No, wasn't looking to derail this thread with that discussion. I just noticed that it could apply to either subject.
But you did and it doesn’t
 
But you did and it doesn’t
I did, but only because the similarity struck me, not in order to go off on a tangent. If someone had posted that in the trans thread, you absolutely would know what they were referring to and it has nothing to do with race. So, yes, it does.

I'm not saying I agree with the cartoon in that premise, only that I see the similarities in argument closely align.
 
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I don't know about that. She denied separating her in the first place. That would suggest some level of guilt. Maybe she didn't realize what she was doing initially, which I can't imagine either, but she certainly realized it when the parent addressed it with her.

Just because the teacher listened to the parent doesn't mean she realizes what she did was wrong

Even after that conversation there's still a real chance the teacher is still of the 'what's the big deal?" mindset
 
Just because the teacher listened to the parent doesn't mean she realizes what she did was wrong

Even after that conversation there's still a real chance the teacher is still of the 'what's the big deal?" mindset
You already know I'm the type of person that likes to give people the benefit of the doubt. After lying to the parent, I have a hard time thinking that, at least deep down, she knew. If she didn't, then hopefully she understands now.
 
I've asked multiple times if there are more than the two videos, both of which I've watched multiple times. Even though more than one person has referred to more evidence and "all the videos," the only response I've gotten is you mocking me. So if there are other videos out there showing Sesame Place parks possibly showing racist behavior, no, I have not seen them.


I appreciate the sentiment and I do appreciate your perspective. The problem I have is that it seems as if you are asking me (society) to make the default to be to believe you (the accuser). So, from my perspective, you are asking me to ignore all of the other situational facts and first assume that, since I know that systemic racism exists and racism is a possibility, it's more than likely the case. That seems less a logical way of looking at things and a more emotional one. That doesn't feel like justice to me, even if it's only in the court of opinion. As we all know, eventually, inevitably, the court of public opinion seeps into the halls of justice. I'm not sure I am capable of putting aside my instincts like that, but that also doesn't mean that I cannot be your ally.

As for "seeing it, experiencing it," yes, I have both seen and experienced first hand, racism and discrimination both perpetuated on others (minorities) and myself (not racial discrimination). I doubt that it's on the same level as everyone else & very definitely not on the level of the general minority population. But I have seen it & I have experienced it and I do know what it looks like. So, if I say that I don't see something that you do, it's not necessarily because I am not capable of seeing it. Also, if I say that I would handle something differently, that's simply human nature. All of us have an idea of how we would handle a situation and typically it's to change the outcome to something that we would consider favorable to us. Different people have different perspectives of what they consider favorable, so obviously the advice may be taken in different ways.


Mufasa on pride rock? I think you have a much higher opinion of my status in society than I do. If you're a zebra, I'm certainly not the king of your domain nor even close to it.

You say you know the difference, but do you really? Certainly when it's blatant, but in every situation do you know the difference? Take for instance this case with this lady and her children, do you know for a certainty that it was more than likely due to racial bias? Do you know anything about the person who perpetuated that racial bias? Is she even white or is she of another race? I assume she wasn't black, but only because the park didn't immediately throw that out there in damage control. Are you so willing to assume that she was racially biased based on what you've seen and the fact that you know that racial biases exist? What if it wasn't racial bias? What if it happened exactly as she said it did? Do you think it's justice for her to have to go through all of this based on the evidence you have? If this thing ends up going to court, which it won't because Sesame Street wouldn't dare risk more bad publicity by taking this lady to court over this, then it's more than likely this young girl's identity will come out. If the situation happened as she said it happened & she really didn't ignore the kids on purpose, do you think that will really matter? Are you prepared for her to be held accountable whether she is truly guilty or not? Because that is what will happen. Her life will be turned upside down over this whether it's deserved or not, if it hasn't already.

Let me ask this: If you are a park manager, what is your solution to this problem? You can give all the sensitivity training you want, but inevitably another minority child will be overlooked and the assumption will immediately be racial bias. Then you're right back where you started, being accused of systemic racial bias within your park. How can you possibly fix that?
There is a lot to unpack here and, being honest, some of it im just not willing to discuss. Mostly because I feel it has been discussed at length, at this point, and I shouldn't bear the burden of educating white people on these things.

You say you asked for more evidence and only received my mocking you but I would rebut why didn't you do the work to find out more? You see, when I read about the initial story and saw the video, I thought, wow that's messed up, I can believe it, and my curiosity lead me to look into the issue because I'm invested in the cause of racial inequality. It means something to me. In that, yes, there was more evidence being provided (more on this phenomenon later.)

That's what I mean about "what is your default posture?" If you are operating from the position "systemic racism exists" and "systemic racism is a problem" and "we need to fix systemic racism" then when you hear about a case of just that and see a video alleging that, if you care, if you are invested, you would go seeking information, you move into action. A privileged person waits to be provided more. To illustrate: your daughter comes home and says, "Dad, I've been assaulted by Joe the mailman." You ask what happened? I doubt your response to her recount would be, "Hmm, that doesn't sound like assault. Joe isn't that guy. Do you have more examples to provide?" No, your default response would be to believe your daughter and, from there, you move into action. That isntvto say if you found out she was mistaken or wrong you wouldn't acknowledge it. But, at first? Yeah, you are going to get to the bottom of it, operating from the stance "it happened."

Why? Because it's your daughter. You care. You are invested. Until persons like yourself are empathetic enough to have that level of concern and investment, nothing will change. It shouldn't take me to give you more. As for the other stuff, that all involves privilege and that's a topic where either you understand or you don't. If you, as a white man, don't understand your level of privilege, it's not worth my time discussing it. I, as an able-bodied black man, clearly understands the privileges I have. One, as a man. I get to walk in a way in this world women can't. Yes, Oprah, singularly, lives a way more lavish lifestyle than I could ever dream of, but that doesn't diminish the privileges I get, even over her, as a man. The same goes for being able-bodied.

You trying to draw an equivalence between our experiences of racism and discrimination to say you are versed enough to "spot" racism is, frankly, comical. You couldn't even be bothered enough to do more research on this issue which is a pretty big tell that you aren't experiencing this type of discrimination on a level where it's impactful on your life or your family's. Questioning whether I can "see it," furthermore, let's me know you just aren't "there" yet. You are more invested in protecting someone being accused of being racist than protecting those claiming to be victims of it.

In other words, Joe's reputation is more important to you than your daughter's accusation. Thanks "friend," but no thanks.

Oh, I almost forgot. My parenthetical point. Much like one rape victim coming forward provides the courage, cover, support and willingness for other victims to come forward, had you dug deeper into this story, you would have realized that once this story broke, other minority parents started providing more verbal and video credence to this matter. For some, it happened, and they were too embarrassed to make a stink over it, treated it as a one-off and moved on, perhaps didn't notice or even gave the benefit of the doubt. Which is why your default posture and believing us is important. Sure, one accusation of rape stands alone, but ten accusations is harder to dismiss. But, your posture towards #1 greatly influences what comes next. "Believe all women" doesn't mean every woman gets carte blanche to make any accusation without scrutiny and is automatically believed, the accused punished with no due process. But, our posture to initially believe a woman claiming assault is a societal acknowledgement that we recognize that type of crime is 1-prevalent, 2-disproportionate to one demographic, 3-under reported by that demographic, and 4-needs overwhelming support to combat its prevalence.

Your default position needs to change. My gut says when you become the victims, disproportionately, of it you will. All I'm asking is that you keep that same energy if you get treated like you so willingly are to allow us to be treated.
 

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