Psychological Support (bipolar depression) (1 Viewer)

[zeetes]

serious question.

a person i know is bipolar (“2” and manic depression), sees a therapist and psychiatrist to treat bipolar/ manic depression. that person is not close to their family and has alienated most of their friends. when having a “manic” moment, doesn’t really know who to turn to for advice and to just talk, which usually happens outside a reasonable window of time, scheduled, to see professional help.

advice? keep in mind, these manic episodes can be happy or negative, but can just as quickly turn into the other. very solidarity inclined person to begin with.

also, a few friends this person has confided in, they have driven away by, well, being bipolar. the few other friends, this person isn’t comfortable talking about issues with. it is kind of a rock and a hard-place situation.

recently, not having researched prior, they made the mistake of reading about such diagnoses. they can’t argue with the symptoms and understand the diagnosis. they also made the mistake of reading into whether or not it can be cured, which, as of today, is no. that hasn’t been a positive trying to process.

i am trying very hard to help, but am running out of options (ways to try and help). i don’t think they are suicidal, but i am also trying to prevent that. there is a lot of positive in their life, but that isn’t how they see or feel about it.

anything, thanks!

 

[crosswatt]

Reddit has a community, r/bipolar, that's more about normalizing the condition than about cures or self diagnosis. Maybe you can point him to that, and encountering other people in a similar situation will do more for him than you can. Not sure, but might be an option. Good luck with whatever ends up being the best option.

 

[zeetes]

Reddit has a community, r/bipolar, that's more about normalizing the condition than about cures or self diagnosis. Maybe you can point him to that, and encountering other people in a similar situation will do more for him than you can. Not sure, but might be an option. Good luck with whatever ends up being the best option.

thank you watt. i’ll check it out and maybe let them know too.

 

[guidomerkinsrules]

What’s going on with the treatments?
Why isn’t it helping?

 

[saintology]

My mother and older brother are / were bipolar. It's a tough alienating disease, and there are a half dozen different flavors of bipolar and t seems. The one constant is the up and downs, and what comes along for the ride with that (depression, schizophrenia, etc.) varies. Balancing the highs and lows without turning them into zombies with medication is incredibly difficult. They love the highs as well, and in many cases refuse medication. Support is the only thing you can do - just being there is half the battle. Most people will walk away from him/her as you said b/c it's hard to deal with but a good support system is so crucial for them dealing with the disease. Doctors pretty much play Russian roulette with meds and it can take some time to find the right combination that works. So, my advise is advocate for them, be there to talk to, and encourage them to seek treatment. Don't try and diagnose or provide it. It's an incredibley complex and difficult condition...

The Reddit support group is a good Suggestion IMO also....good on you trying to be there for them!

 

[RetroMcBananaFace]

I have gone back and forth on whether to respond to this, fear of revealing too much about myself. But whatever.

I've dealt with chronic anxiety/depression all my life, my sister is bipolar and manic depressive (she's in a mental hospital right now actually). Long history of depression, suicide, alcoholism, prescription drug abuse, etc. in my family, it all goes together.

With something like bipolar/manic stuff, my (imperfect) understanding is that it needs to be managed with drugs, first and foremost. The person sees it as altering their personality, it feels wrong to them. When I took meds for my anxiety, I absolutely understood that. I felt in a haze. I wasn't so sad anymore, but I also didn't get any joy from the simple things I typically enjoy - music, or a good taco, or whatever. But I had the luxury of getting off the meds once I had righted the ship a little bit and figured out alternatives - therapy, meditation, etc.

Your friend probably doesn't have the option to ditch the meds, sadly. But there are probably ways to integrate things like meditation/breathing exercises, self-talk and things like that into their life that will help. Diet, exercise and sunlight are HUGE factors in day-to-day mood management. It might all sound like a bunch of hippified crap (it did to me at first) but it works and the fact I'm still kicking around is testament to that.

If your friend is truly in a really bad spot, a stint in a mental rehabilitation center might be the best option. There is obviously a lot of stigma around that, but it's really not so different from an extended therapy session, with the added bonus of removing the person from the everyday life situations that are proving harmful to their health.

But ultimately only the person can do it for themeselves and so many people have to hit rock bottom before they reach the conclusion they have to do something about it. If your friend continues to decide that the highs are worth the lows then there's not much you or anybody else can do about it.

 

[where yat brah]

I commend you for the above post. You have practically laid out the life of one of my older sisters. Best succinct description of the issues I've ever seen.

 

[TriPolarTroy]

I'm Bipolar Type 1 with mixed episodes and rapid cycling .....I have a youtube channel where I talk about my daily struggle, what works, what doesn't etc.

TriPolarTroy

and a FB page ----> TripolarTroy's Manic World

 

[MSUSousaphone]

As a therapist, don't be afraid to drop the professionals a letter if things get too bad. I can only work with what the client brings to my attention and they often downplay how bad things get. I wouldn't be able to respond without a release of information but outside help when things get awful is needed.

 

[Saint_Ward]

Personally, I'm not a fan of psychiatrists, especially for teens. They tend to be medication pushers and don't really talk to their patients much. They are likely to be over booked and run a near assembly line. We've gone through 3, and those 3 are very much alike. The last one's office was just terrible and rude too. Done with it.

An assembly line is good for people who just need medication, but it's bad, to actually know your patients and make sure that the medication is still the best course of action.

I think a therapist.. a LCSW or a Psychologist are better options. You can still see the Psychiatrist, or use a primary doctor, so long as they're on board (but they'll want some sort of therapy going on).

So, my suggestion would be to find a talk therapist or psychotherapist where that friend can go see more often, and call or text in an emergency to work through something. Also, I know my job has a "family resource" number, which I believe can put you in touch with a therapist over the phone to just talk about stuff. Maybe there is a hotline out there?

 

[Saint_Ward]

TL;DR, they aren't managing their mental health if they only see a psychiatrist. Also see a psychologist or a licensed therapist (which they're doing.. so good. But your friend should have the ability to contact them outside of hours, or have a safety plan of sorts). Also ask about numbers to call for more immediate issues, like a hotline.

 

[LuvNOLA]

NAMI.org
National Alliance on Mental Illness

Compassionate & very knowledgeable group that will help you to help your friend.

Good luck!

 

[zeetes]

i have been hesitant to respond to this thread, much less read. i used a “friend” partly out of sarcasm, mostly embarrassment. i am ashamed of this “condition”, but easter was really depressing.

i absolutely hate this more than a lot of people can imagine. i often don’t feel in control, most of the time, and it has caused a strained relationship with a few of my closest friends. that makes me sadder more than anything, because i can be an *******, but more importantly i don’t want to disappoint. i also have an issue with unresolved conflicts, no matter who caused it.

i have suffered with most symptoms throughout my life, but i was fortunate with my marriage to have a wife that kept the isolation at bay. i am 39, 19 of those years spent with her. with her, i was never as depressed as i often feel now. without her, it has uncovered a lot of traits that i knew were there, but i thought that they were normal. unfortunately, my manic episodes have evident a very long time, but worse now is that they are a lot more pronounced.

i am rather social, by nature, when thrust into a situation, but the anxiety i feel knowing i have to spend time with others, is usually really high. only with some of my friends it is not pronounced.

i have enjoyed messageboards since the days of bbs. they allow me to participate when I WANT to.

it is crazy because i often feel isolated/lonely, but i avoid people whenever possible. one of my good friends saw this thread, immediately called me. asked if i was interested in visiting saturday, yet for as much as i want to, a part of me was looking for an excuse not to.

one of the friends that i have alienated (mostly), it makes her really upset when i have a moment, usually on the low side. she has broken off most communication because she has her own problems, and i just magnify how she feels. it makes me sad that for as hard as i have tried, i can’t change, nor chane her mind.

i did not understand bipolar, prior to diagnosis, but sadly, it was only when i started to take notice. it really bothers me that looking back, the symptoms have been there, yet not detected. i often wonder how much different i would be knowing sooner, but in reality, without my wife, i would most likely be in the same situation.

anyway, thank you all for the support.

I have gone back and forth on whether to respond to this, fear of revealing too much about myself. But whatever.

I've dealt with chronic anxiety/depression all my life, my sister is bipolar and manic depressive (she's in a mental hospital right now actually). Long history of depression, suicide, alcoholism, prescription drug abuse, etc. in my family, it all goes together.

With something like bipolar/manic stuff, my (imperfect) understanding is that it needs to be managed with drugs, first and foremost. The person sees it as altering their personality, it feels wrong to them. When I took meds for my anxiety, I absolutely understood that. I felt in a haze. I wasn't so sad anymore, but I also didn't get any joy from the simple things I typically enjoy - music, or a good taco, or whatever. But I had the luxury of getting off the meds once I had righted the ship a little bit and figured out alternatives - therapy, meditation, etc.

Your friend probably doesn't have the option to ditch the meds, sadly. But there are probably ways to integrate things like meditation/breathing exercises, self-talk and things like that into their life that will help. Diet, exercise and sunlight are HUGE factors in day-to-day mood management. It might all sound like a bunch of hippified crap (it did to me at first) but it works and the fact I'm still kicking around is testament to that.

If your friend is truly in a really bad spot, a stint in a mental rehabilitation center might be the best option. There is obviously a lot of stigma around that, but it's really not so different from an extended therapy session, with the added bonus of removing the person from the everyday life situations that are proving harmful to their health.

But ultimately only the person can do it for themeselves and so many people have to hit rock bottom before they reach the conclusion they have to do something about it. If your friend continues to decide that the highs are worth the lows then there's not much you or anybody else can do about it.

thank you.

i absolutely agree with you. the meds help, infact have probably kept me alive. on the other hand, there have been a few medications where i just felt like a zombie or wanted to sleep all day. actually, being between meds right now, has let me feel more like myself than anything. unfortunately, along with it are the manic highs and lows. oh well.

I commend you for the above post. You have practically laid out the life of one of my older sisters. Best succinct description of the issues I've ever seen.

thank you. it is a pretty accurate description of how i normally feel. it sounds crazy, but that is my life.

I'm Bipolar Type 1 with mixed episodes and rapid cycling .....I have a youtube channel where I talk about my daily struggle, what works, what doesn't etc.

TriPolarTroy

and a FB page ----> TripolarTroy's Manic World

i don’t fb, but i will totally check out the youtbe channel. thank you so much.

As a therapist, don't be afraid to drop the professionals a letter if things get too bad. I can only work with what the client brings to my attention and they often downplay how bad things get. I wouldn't be able to respond without a release of information but outside help when things get awful is needed.

thank you, my therapist is wonderful. unfortunately, she isn’t there with me at all times, she has been a great influence on how i spend some of my free time. it was hard, but only once i realised, only being completely honest eith her was i able to be straightforward and tell the truth/full details.

brings me to another, um, quirk, i have had male therapists and a psychologist, but i couldn’t tell them everything. it didn’t “feel” right. i guesx it is the male in me. i have both a female therapist and psychiatrist, purposefully, and much more comfortable.

Personally, I'm not a fan of psychiatrists, especially for teens. They tend to be medication pushers and don't really talk to their patients much. They are likely to be over booked and run a near assembly line. We've gone through 3, and those 3 are very much alike. The last one's office was just terrible and rude too. Done with it.

An assembly line is good for people who just need medication, but it's bad, to actually know your patients and make sure that the medication is still the best course of action.

I think a therapist.. a LCSW or a Psychologist are better options. You can still see the Psychiatrist, or use a primary doctor, so long as they're on board (but they'll want some sort of therapy going on).

So, my suggestion would be to find a talk therapist or psychotherapist where that friend can go see more often, and call or text in an emergency to work through something. Also, I know my job has a "family resource" number, which I believe can put you in touch with a therapist over the phone to just talk about stuff. Maybe there is a hotline out there?

i would agree, but my psychiatrist is very personable and is persistent in making sure any medications prescribed, how i feel taking them. most of my session is spent on how i have spent my free time. i had a iffy feeling about psychiatrists, before my last one (she moved). after several sessions, medications prescribed have helped. my poior pcp has tried to help, but mental craziness just isn’t his specialty. whats weird is that i am completely honest with him, but he is also a froend of my wife’s family, so i have a comfort with

NAMI.org
National Alliance on Mental Illness

Compassionate & very knowledgeable group that will help you to help your friend.

Good luck!

thank you. i will have to check it out. i appreciate it because i’m hesitant to google for help, because reading everything that i have, it is just more depressing. a lot of sites and information is written more for caretakers.

 

[RetroMcBananaFace]

zeetes, you are brave to reveal this. I honestly thought it was about your friend not yourself.

The main thing I think to remember is that none of this is anything to be ashamed about. It's a chemical imbalance, a physical issue. That's why (again my own limited understanding) the meds are necessary. The other stuff I think, support groups, mental exercises, seeing a therapist and so on, are more like ways to cope daily when the meds aren't enough.

As I remind myself just about everyday, it's not what happens to you but how you react to it. Just being aware of that can keep you from making destructive choices that lead you into the downward spiral. For me, it was falling into an up all night/sleep all day cycle and then booze on top of that.

It may be different for you, but it's important to break whatever habits you have that contribute to you not taking care of yourself, mind, body and spirit. and often taking care of your body (again, sunlight, diet, exercise, etc) is enough to get the mind to follow.

What really sucks is there aren't easy answers. It's a lot of hard work and self examination and asking yourself the tough questions. The people that say a pill will fix everything are full of crap. The meds will help even you out but ultimately the only thing that will help you "fix" anything is your own will to do something about it.

and I know that's easy to say, not so easy to do - especially when you're in the depths of it. The trick is to get some upward momentum going so the downs aren't so down, and so you learn to recognize the things that trigger the downs so you can head them off before things get too bad.

My experiences are again pretty mild compared to your own, but dealing with my sister and talking to my mother-in-law, who has become sort of my mental health mentor at this point (probably no coincidence I married into a family of therapists, LOL) hopefully there is something worth thinking about.

 

[guidomerkinsrules]

all love zeetes - i went through my own bout of depression in the Fall and that **** was no fun (and to Ward's point my GP proscribed me some medication that made things MUCH worse)

i'm glad you're seeing a doc who you like

be kind to yourself