You Just Broke Your Child. Congratulations. (25 Viewers)

[guidomerkinsrules]

that is probably part of it sure, but poor mothers are also louder and harsher with their language most of the time. And you know that these children are not being told "you can do anything you set your mind to" at home. Which is a worse problem than the general breaking of the children IMO. What happened to these parents wanting more for their children. They then think the only way that they will have more than their parents is by being a rap/rock star or sports figure because that is the only people they see making it big other than drug dealers. Kids not being encouraged to chase dreams is the larger tragedy IMHO.

And it is easy to generalize this to the black community but that is also a numbers game. We see it here more and in other cities because that is the largest poor community but there is no doubt that the same thing goes on in poor white neighborhoods in other cities and rural areas.

Is that what they think or what they’ve been told?

And on the subway (and elsewhere) it seemed like the loud, physical discipline was as much for the publi as for the kids- like if the mom didn’t display stern discipline then everyone would glaringly or vocally give her **** for it

 

[Zack Lee]

Is that what they think or what they’ve been told?

Im not sure what you are driving at but if they are not told better then they are left to what they think and they will think what they see on TV

And on the subway (and elsewhere) it seemed like the loud, physical discipline was as much for the publi as for the kids- like if the mom didn’t display stern discipline then everyone would glaringly or vocally give her **** for it

I'm talking about talking to them like they are garbage not discipline. Sure you could say its mixed together but the discipline doesn't necessitate taking to like they are garbage.

 

[Cage1]

When I was about 12 or 13, my dad gave me a $50 bill to hold while we ran errands before driving to the video store.

I'm trying to understand why this part even happened at all. Almost seems like a setup for some sort of lesson.

 

[livefromDC]

I'm trying to understand why this part even happened at all. Almost seems like a setup for some sort of lesson.

Thats on me, I'm sure. I always liked to hold big bills. I didn't get to see them offend much less hold them, so I probably asked him to hold it. That or he offered it up thinking I couldn't possibly lose it in a car ride.

 

[KiwiSaint]

I never really understood all the boo-hooing about Cat's in the Cradle. I mean, yeah, I understand the point Croce's trying to make. But, strictly considering the ACTUAL lyrics, the worst thing about the protagonist father is that after the son grows up he sounds pretty selfish and needy.

Of course the kid wants to hang out with his old buddies when he comes home from college. And, Jesus, later he's just told you that he's dealing with a new job and his kid's got the flu -- get on a damn plane already and go help him out instead of whining that he doesn't have time to gab with you on the phone!!

Chapin...

 

[HoustonSaint68]

Chapin...

Oops. Of course...

 

[Jeff Miller]

Don't breed with people who make bad parents. Yes, you know the bad boys, douche bags, and crazy trophy women you are with. You know their not great people, but you breed with them anyways.

 

[Optimus Prime]

I just watched the 30 for 30 on Junior Seau

His father really did a number on him

Every loss was his fault

Didn't matter if he had 5 sacks and 2 picks and it didn't matter if the offense totally shirt the bed, he didn't do enough, and should be ashamed of himself for not doing enough

What does growing up with that every week do to you?

 

[Tony1Saintfan]

I just watched the 30 for 30 on Junior Seau

His father really did a number on him

Every loss was his fault

Didn't matter if he had 5 sacks and 2 picks and it didn't matter if the offense totally shirt the bed, he didn't do enough, and should be ashamed of himself for not doing enough

What does growing up with that every week do to you?

I can tell you what it does. It cripples that child’s self esteem and makes them feel unworthy. I wish I could tell you that I’d never seen that but unfortunately I have. My ex wife was a teacher and she had many kids that came into her 3rd grade class who’s parents had already installed a fear of failure into them. There was a video I saw on the news a couple of weeks ago about a brawl at a 7 year olds baseball game. That is so damn ridiculous I wish I was making it up. I coached little league for many years and I don’t mind saying I was pretty good at it. Then this trend started to happen. Kids were playing on traveling teams. They ended up playing baseball year round. The parents didn’t understand that those kids need a break to go swimming or whatever just time to be a kid. We had a general practice one day with no games and all of the kids show up. We were fortunate enough that one of our coaches was a physical therapist and had helped out with LSU’s baseball team. He called and got Skip Bertman. He was so gracious and a really nice guy.He taught me more in one day than I had ever known about the game. While he was watching some of the kids pitching he got concerned and called all of the coaches over into a group. He said what you’d are doing is wrong. He said if he was coaching at the level that I was coaching he would ban curveballs until the kid was 15. That gave a kid the chance to develop a better structure to the bones in the elbow. He was right and from then on we allowed 2 pitches. The first was a fast ball and the second was a change up. IMHO kids these days have too much pressure to be independent adults the day they turn 12.

 

[BroKV]

I have 5 kids (Daughter 22, Son 19, Son 17, Daughter 15 and Daughter 14) and as of now they are....

22 year old - Doing well, full-time job but we feel she could be doing a lot more with her life. Long time boyfriend who doesn’t work or go to school, who’s parents are well off and spoil him.

19 year old - Has 3 felonies, on probation and has no job or drive to do anything. Bounces around from friends house to friends house. Doctors said he has ODD since a young age.

17 year old - He will graduate, pretty good and responsible. He just went to juvenile diversion for punching out a kid at school who allegedly forced himself on my 15 year olds best friend who is like family.

15 year old - All honors all through HS and full time cheerleader, good kid and responsible.

14 year old - A lot like my 17 year old and also a full time cheerleader. She’s the baby for sure.

I’ve been married for 20 years this November and I used all my life till December 30th 2014. My wife is great Mother and stuck with me through thick and thin. Was I a bad parent all those years, maybe. Am I a better parent now, I hope so. It is really had to correlate how your children turned out versus learning how to parent.

 

[Optimus Prime]

Father’s Day bump

 

[BELOWSEALEVEL]

Being a parent is hard work. It's the toughest job I've ever had .
December 8th, 2015 my daughter was born. Three doctors told my wife she would never have kids. Tilted uterus, scar tissue, etc etc. I guess I proved them wrong. I always joke....right angle, right time. 9 months later, 8lbs 12iz and 21 inches. She's still on pace to be roughly 5-10.
Anyways, the first 6 months were very hard on my wife. She's a military brat so her patience for things is not the best.
We're both against child care and that wasn't an option. Long story short, she came to my job one afternoon and told me I was the best dad our daughter could ask for. The next sentence blew me away.
I want you to quit your job and be a full time dad. 2 weeks later she found a job that actually made more money than I was making and I put in my 2 weeks notice.
Our plan was to make the double income sacrifice and wait till she was in school full-time before I went back to the work force.
4 years ago I was an auditor and loss prevention officer. Now I'm taking classes for home inspection. As a home inspector, it will allow me to work within our daughters school schedule. I will be able to make my own schedule and work for myself.
I've had all kinds of jobs growing up, but being a full time dad is the hardest most gratifying job I've ever had. You have to be hands on 24-7, 365 days a year. I haven't had a day off or a babysitter since I began the full time daddy role. I've played 1 round of golf in 4 years....that's sacrifice.
My wife didn't want our daughter to go through the same things she did as a child.
She recognized that her disciplined child hood was coming out and expecting a baby/now 4 1/2 to go through the same things she did wasn't going to happen.
My daughter is full of life, full of questions, and confident as can be. Shes very social, smart as a whip, and caring.
Talk to your kids, it works wonders.
Put yourself second, and the kids first.

PS. I use about 15% of my phone battery a day. The parents glued to theirs, put them down. Use them when they're sleeping.
If you put anything before your kids, you shouldn't have had them

 

[Madmarsha]

Being a parent is hard work. It's the toughest job I've ever had .
December 8th, 2015 my daughter was born. Three doctors told my wife she would never have kids. Tilted uterus, scar tissue, etc etc. I guess I proved them wrong. I always joke....right angle, right time. 9 months later, 8lbs 12iz and 21 inches. She's still on pace to be roughly 5-10.
Anyways, the first 6 months were very hard on my wife. She's a military brat so her patience for things is not the best.
We're both against child care and that wasn't an option. Long story short, she came to my job one afternoon and told me I was the best dad our daughter could ask for. The next sentence blew me away.
I want you to quit your job and be a full time dad. 2 weeks later she found a job that actually made more money than I was making and I put in my 2 weeks notice.
Our plan was to make the double income sacrifice and wait till she was in school full-time before I went back to the work force.
4 years ago I was an auditor and loss prevention officer. Now I'm taking classes for home inspection. As a home inspector, it will allow me to work within our daughters school schedule. I will be able to make my own schedule and work for myself.
I've had all kinds of jobs growing up, but being a full time dad is the hardest most gratifying job I've ever had. You have to be hands on 24-7, 365 days a year. I haven't had a day off or a babysitter since I began the full time daddy role. I've played 1 round of golf in 4 years....that's sacrifice.
My wife didn't want our daughter to go through the same things she did as a child.
She recognized that her disciplined child hood was coming out and expecting a baby/now 4 1/2 to go through the same things she did wasn't going to happen.
My daughter is full of life, full of questions, and confident as can be. Shes very social, smart as a whip, and caring.
Talk to your kids, it works wonders.
Put yourself second, and the kids first.

PS. I use about 15% of my phone battery a day. The parents glued to theirs, put them down. Use them when they're sleeping.
If you put anything before your kids, you shouldn't have had them

Great post.

 

[Madmarsha]

Don't breed with people who make bad parents. Yes, you know the bad boys, douche bags, and crazy trophy women you are with. You know their not great people, but you breed with them anyways.

100%

 

[gboudx]

Today my 2 boys surprised me with a Fathers Day car that they bought, not my wife. The oldest is 20 youngest 16. Miracles still happen.